Online Parenting Classes

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Dear parents,

We’re thrilled to partner with you by offering an online parenting class each month. We’ve taken the time to figure out REAL issues families are dealing with at the Preschool, Elementary, and Jr./Sr. High age levels and packaged some great resources in regard to those. Our hope is that these would help you on your parenting journey .

We have created an archive for previous classes, too, so you may refer back to them or check them out if you missed them.  Here are the links to the previous classes by age range:

PRESCHOOL        ELEMENTARY        JR./SR. HIGH

Here are the 3 ONLINE CLASSES FOR MARCH 2017! I hope you will find them beneficial.

I want to remind you that I love and care about each of you. Please let me know how I help you, and how I can pray for you and our family. 

Your partner,

Sharon Guard, Director of Family Ministry   

Email: sguard@andersonhillsumc.org            Phone: 513-231-4172


 

How to Deal with Backtalk

 PART 1:

Think back to the not-so-distant past when you couldn’t wait for your little one to say “Momma”, “Dadda”, “Bye-bye”, “Thank-you” and all those other wonderful first words.

You were awed and amazed by everything they said. Now that they’ve become preschoolers though, their vocabulary is increasing daily, but now you wish they weren’t quite so verbal.

Our current Online Parenting Class video addresses this issue by offering practical advice and wisdom in dealing with a preschooler’s sassy backtalk in a way that will be pleasing to God while creating an atmosphere of positivity in your home.


 

PART 2:

The task of teaching your preschooler to use their words respectfully and politely can be challenging; especially since they don’t always understand when they’ve said something inappropriate.

Hopefully, however, the following tips will help you get the job done.

1. Speak to your preschooler the way you want them to speak to you and to others.

2. Don’t over-react. When your preschooler says something they shouldn’t, calmly but firmly explain that this isn’t a) a word they are allowed to use or b) this is not a nice way to talk. Follow this by giving them a good word to use and/or demonstrate the proper way to say what they said.

3. When your preschooler says something in a sassy or disrespectful voice, tell them to repeat what they said the right way.

4. Be consistent. Don’t allow your preschooler to sass you when they’re tired but not when they’re fully rested.

Your children are God’s gift to you. Treat them with all the TLC they deserve, and don’t forget to live God’s Word as you parent them through their preschool years.

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” ~Ephesians 6:4

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” ~Proverbs 22:6

How to Fight Fair

PART 1:

This month’s parenting video features a unique topic: how to fight fair with your kids. Does it seem a little strange to receive information on how to fight with your kids? The reality is fights happen. But there are healthy, effective ways to manage arguments to achieve positive results rather than building a thicker wall between you and your kid.

Arguments, more often than not, are power struggles; both people want to be right and will fight to the bitter end to end up on top as the winner. Recognizing this is what is going on with your child could shift how you approach the argument! They are little people acting out of their sin nature that everyone has—young and old alike. They want to win.

Here is where it’s important for you as the parent to act as the parent. Do a self-check for any anxiety you might be bringing in to the situation. Have you had a stressful day at work? Have you been arguing with your spouse or a friend? Your issues at that moment could play into how you respond. They could possibly cloud the situation at hand, and you might not see things not as they really are.

However, if the discussion escalates to a place of disrespect, your job is to make sure you don’t spiral to that same place as well. No matter how your child acts, responds or disrespects you, no matter how angry he or she gets, your son on daughter does not control how you behave. You can control your response. Charles Stanley once wrote, “A Christian has no right to fight unless it’s a spiritual fight.”

We sure hope this Online Parenting class has been helpful in dealing with fights that might erupt with your child. God’s Word promises that when we ask for help, He will respond: “Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need” (Heb. 4:16).

 

PART 2:

What do you do if a heated discussion escalates to the point where you are losing your temper?

Let’s say you come home from being away from the house for a few hours to find the kitchen a mess and your child’s personal belongings all over the living room. You have company coming over in an hour, and you were not planning on spending the next thirty minutes cleaning up! Here are some ideas:

1. Stop what you are doing. Rather than opening your mouth and immediately reprimanding your child for trashing the house, take a breath. Don’t say anything until you pull yourself together.

2. Plan what you want to say to your child. When you have calmed down, and perhaps after talking to your spouse or a friend, plan or write out exactly what words you want to say and what tone you will say them in.

3. Take action. Tell your child why you are frustrated and what he or she needs to do next.

4. Retreat. Once you’ve said what you planned to say, disengage from the fight. Give them space to respond to your request.

The Bible provides some clear instruction for what God thinks about fighting, and He’s not too keen on it. Colossians 3:8 says to put off all such things as anger, rage, malice, slander, and abusive language, and Galatians 5:19–25 refers to angry outbursts, conflict and factions (among many other character traits) as part of a person’s old, corrupt nature before believing in God.

Parenting is not easy; that’s for sure! And parenting children who lose their tempers and have angry outbursts feels nearly impossible. However, God tells parents how they are to respond: with love, joy, peace, and patience, with great gentleness and self-control (Gal. 5:22–23).

Hopefully, this Online Parenting Class has equipped you with a few tips for how to settle down before a discussion with your child becomes a fight. We understand how difficult parenting is, and are ready with resources and advice when you need it. We are praying for you!

   

Rage vs. Anger

PART 1

Our Online Parenting video this month talks about how more times than not what you may be labeling as an angry teen may actually be rage—a loss of control manifesting itself in yelling and sometimes physical outbursts.

Think of the many external forces pressing in on teens today. Teens often feel trapped between childhood and adulthood and the expectations that go with that awkward transition. They are accountable to teachers, coaches, employers and their parents who add stress to their life that they are often not able to manage well. Not mature enough to deal with those pressures, teens often express their emotions in outbursts of rage. They will tend to hold it together (hopefully) around other adults but let loose when they are around you—a wonderful perk to parenting!

When verbally attacked, a person’s natural response is to retaliate. The one attacked yells back or fumes inwardly. When your teen loses control, and you are the recipient of their outburst, how do you respond? Do you “retaliate,” and yell back? Have you reflected on the possibility that your teen probably has caught this vibe and learned that, in your home, this is the way communication happens? Anger is contagious; if you tend to respond in rage, your teen likely will, too.

Anger never demands respect but rather shows a person is out of control. Have you been modeling anger to your teen? Yelling increasingly louder to diffuse a tense situation is the least effective way to respond.

Consider taking a personal inventory of how you respond to your teen when he or she has reached the boiling point. Have you treated your teen disrespectfully or unfairly? Has your teen possibly felt constrained or even overlooked? Have you made commitments only to break them? Do you multi-task when your teen is talking? These are hard questions, but your responses may be indicative to why your teen responds the way they do, reflected in how they communicate with you.

Your goal in parenting is to love your child well, and parent in a way that fosters a godly relationship with your teen. If you have perhaps contributed to a culture of communication in your home that results in raised voices or even rage, consider asking God for guidance and strength to change. Tell your teen, when things are calm, that verbally assaulting each other will not be the acceptable way to communicate anymore. If anger has been the typical way you interact with your teen, keep in mind your son or daughter probably won’t respond the first time you try to respond calmly. Change won’t occur overnight, but it won’t happen at all unless you commit to trying!


Please check out this month's online parenting class:

 

PART 2:

Teens are often angry, even if they don’t know why! If your teen doesn’t know, it’s near impossible for you to figure it out either!

In their book Parenting Today’s Adolescent: Helping Your Child Avoid the Traps of the Preteen and Teen Years, Dennis and Barbara Rainey share some wise counsel for parents who may be dealing with a teen struggling with anger or rage issues. One profound comment they make is that our goal in parenting is to help our teens learn to express anger appropriately and not let it become sin.

In Galatians, Paul provides a list of what he calls the “fruit of the Spirit”—the overflow of God in the believer’s heart that should be evident to those around them. One of those characteristics is self-control. In the Bible, this idea of self-control is expressed in the way Greek athletes competed. Paul writes, “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control” (1 Cor. 9:25–27 ESV). Self-control, according to Paul, involves saying no to sinful desires, even when it hurts.

The Rainey’s write, “Our children need to learn that as we surrender the control of our lives to the Holy Spirit, He produces in us the self-control that is needed to deal with anger.”

Challenge your teen to take steps to deal with frustration in a more constructive way. Encourage them to ask God for help, because it is too difficult to do it on their own. As parents, we want to help our teens to heed Ephesians 4:26: “In your anger do not sin.” It’s ok to be angry; it becomes sin when anger becomes out of control.

I know this is a hard subject, and many of you are baffled at your teen’s emotions that change like the wind! I am praying for you and here for support.